For adults like you and me, there is no shortage of events that trigger our anger. An annoying friend, an online stalker, the traffic, workload, fight with mom, a boyfriend who is always 10 minutes late- there is no end to this list! And we just want to scream and fight and ask them to behave. But that’s not possible. If you have been holding the steam in for quite some time now and feel that you will burst any day, hang on and read this article.
Anger is a basic emotion. Feeling that your anger is justified, you need to vent and people around you are just too sensitive is a common thought. But the truth is, no one wants a bitter and aggressive friend. Anger might come in the way of your judgment, relationships, career, and the way people see you. The art of anger management takes practice and the help of your dear ones. And the payoff is huge!
So if you are ready to get your anger under control, we have 7 ways help you:
- The 10-minute rule. Buy yourself some time when you feel you are about to get involved in an argument. You don’t want to say things in the heat of the moment, only to regret it in future. Take a few minutes off, go for a walk or listen to some music, breathe in breathe out and collect your thoughts before you speak. Once you are calm, state your concerns without being hurtful. Keep in mind the following things while making a statement:
- Discuss the present problem. Do not bring up the past unless absolutely necessary.
- Make “I” statements instead of “You” statements.
- Be assertive in your opinions instead of sentimental and dramatic.
- Get physical. Physical activity helps in reducing stress. Exercise can improve the flow of endorphins and help balance your mood. Good old yoga and meditation are helpful too. Take out your frustration on a punching bag or go for a run. Some people shout and yell to let go of the anger but it might hurt the people on the receiving end.
- Use humor. Look for humor in the situation to diffuse the tension. Take a break to watch some funny videos or think of something ridiculous to deflate the overblown tension. However, avoid sarcasm. Many people tend to get offended (tch tch). check out our poster
- Work on the solutions. Instead of focusing on what made you mad, focus on resolving the issue. If someone is annoying you online, block them or take some time off from social media. If traffic on your office route makes you mad, plan an alternate route. Also, make your priorities. Vent your anger only if the issue is really worth your time and energy.
- Forgive and Forget. Easier said than done, but forgiveness is a powerful tool. If you let anger and negativity crowd around you, you are only going to get bitter. Pinpoint what you are really angry about and work on it. Intentionally let go of the past because your loved ones are more important than “winning the fight”.
- Self-care. You might be thinking that we talk way too much about self-care. Well, we do because it is that important! When your temper flares, put your relaxation skills to work. Chant “take it easy” and indulge in activities that make you feel good. Press the pause button from the anger-provoking situation. Do simple things like hydrating yourself and taking a nap.
- Ill advice! No psychologist will tell you this but FOOD is a great solution when it comes to anger. There is nothing so terrible that can’t be cured with chocolates and ice cream. However, do not drink alcohol to reduce your anger (it seems like a mood booster but instigates trouble real quick!)
And finally, avoid people and situations that bring out the worst in you. Learn to stop looking for small issues to justify anger. Instead, try to recognize the positive in every situation.
If you have anything to share or simply take out your anger, make good use of the comment section. We are here to listen. 🙂